Bachelor parties

Other fun times are the bachelor parties: sometimes you have a feeling that the school bus arrived. Grown-up men in their thirties, forties but they behave like overexcited teenage boys who see tits first time in their lives. I still don’t find the answer why that is. Maybe the peer pressure. Sometimes they pay a show or a private dance for the bachelor, otherwise, they just ogle with their eyes.

Every Knight goes through a special training to be qualified. These are called Bachelor parties. This is the total humiliation of a man so that later on he could bear his woman’s whims and tantrums. In South Africa they are more like fancy dress parties, bachelors entered the club dressed like huge babies wearing nothing just a big textile nappy. Others were dressed like Pink Panthers because women like to take care of babies and kittens. I remember I saw one guy with his arm in a plaster and he held a nursing bottle with alcohol in it. So he had the drink but he couldn’t drink it, sometimes his friends were kind and gave him a sip from their own glass. It was teaching him that after the wedding he can drink only when his woman allows him to, or when his good friend organises a short escape from home away from his woman. In Germany a poor bachelor was standing on the street with a huge carton table with a hole, you know the one he could stick out his head from, and everybody on the street could throw something at him from a basket. I couldn’t identify the objects, they were maybe some paintballs. All managed by his friends. Such good friends, he has!

And if you have never seen a bachelor party, here I write down how it is. I’ve seen a lot in Germany when the friends of the bachelor request a special show for him. It is usually a two-song entertaining. It starts as a normal dance on stage, the girl dances sexy, teasing him. Often there is a chair on the stage so she can give him a short lap dance grinding on him. When he is already in the mood, she takes off his shirt. She also goes topless. She demands him to kneel down on the ground while she takes off his belt. She puts the belt on his neck, sits on his back and asks him to walk around. This is the point when his friends start to scream and whistle and also laugh at him. The training is started. She rides him. Often she holds a riding-crop, if not she uses her hand to slap his bum a few times encouraging him to follow her request. Dear married men who went through similar training, don’t forget that moment when your wife asks you to put that picture on the wall the fifth time! Then she lays him down on the stage while she goes above him. More tortures follow. She puts some ice cubes in her mouth and is teasing his body with the ice taking it in turns with her warm and soft lips. He literally gets hot and cold from her like he will get from his wife in marriage. When he starts to enjoy the moment, she suddenly puts more ice into his pants – another moment when his friends cheer. Then she continues the tortures with candles and pouring wax on his torso. In the end, because he was brave to endure these abuses, she rewards him with red lipstick marks on his body and with a pen she writes love messages on it. When she finally lets him stand up, his body is wet and covered with wax, lipstick and pen marks, but she has not finished yet. She asks him to stand up facing the pole and she ties him up. She dances a bit pushing her boobs to his back and she takes off his trousers. She beats him up a few times with the belt. You can hear his friends from the side saying “Ouch!” and at the very last moment she takes off his underwear. So our bachelor is standing on the stage tied up, naked.

Alternatively, I’ve seen shows when after the riding the dancer also kneeled down, she put whipped cream on her bum cheeks and asked the bachelor to lick it, but when he was close to her she always made a move ahead. Like when the cat is playing with the mouse. In another show the dancer was more brutal when the bachelor was standing on the stage only in his pants, she grabbed huge scissors and cropped his underwear on both sides making a G-string for him. Well, a man has to deal with more torture in his marriage if he didn’t choose the right one.

But if the man has his own strength of character and is able to hold his own also emotionally, it’s no way for him to be intimidated. Some bachelors doing his part of the show just laughing along together with his friends. Like a ‘Come what may’ attitude.

(From the book Bedtime Stories from Stripperland)

https://publioboox.com/en_gb/bedtime-stories-from-stripperland

Insight of a Japanese hostess club

Suddenly a big fat guy came in, his fleshy nose was already red from alcohol and when he noticed me, he immediately requested me. Annushka, our Russian barmaid came to take me to his table. The guy was wearing a greyish office suit and was sweating like he was running from work straight to our club. I gave him the towel and he cleaned the beads of sweat from his forehead, then idly threw it on the table.
“I love big boobs!”
What an impressive introduction!
I was really thankful for my push-up bra and the skin-tight top I chose for the first night, they give me amazing cleavage and took the focus from my tired face. He placed his head on my shoulder but his eyes wandered down on my chest in a hope he could just take a peek under my dress. Such a desperate man, so miserable, I thought. The guy who only wants to peek into my cleavage doesn’t start from a good position.
I cleared my throat loudly.
“So would you like whiskey or soju?”
Soju, soju…” He placed his hand on my hip and forced me to sit closer to him. He took it as an encouragement that I didn’t push his hands away.
Well, I have worked several years in different strip clubs, I got used to men staring and touching my body and entering my comfort zone. I think my bare skin on my tights and arms was like a rhinoceros skin; too thick to feel these touches any more.
My body was tired and my brain was drained to react in any way but his neediness disgusted me. I made his drink with automatic moves. Everything was set on the table, one full bottle of whiskey and one bottle of soju – customers could drink these for free of charge – a jug of water, glasses, a bucket of ice, tower of ashtrays and a lighter, serviettes; everything in reachable distance to make sure I didn’t need to stand up from the table to serve my customer. I put three pieces of ice cubes into his glass, poured some soju on it then filled it up with water.
Dozo.” I placed the glass in front of him on the table and offered him to drink it. He narrowed his eyes and looked at me with a grin on his face while he stirred his index finger above the glass showing me that I forgot to mix the alcohol with the water.
Gommennasai!” I grabbed the metal woman-body shaped stirrer from the ice bucket and quickly stirred his drink.

Now you can drink it, bastard! I thought while I was forcefully smiling at him.

(From the book The Stripper and the Yakuza)

Men, gentlemen, guys

I have good news for you: my book is finally finished! The most exciting period is yet to come, to find a publisher or literary agent whom I can establish a good relationship for my future plans. Difficult, but it’s not impossible. If I could have reached the point where I’m standing now, there is nothing to stop me from achieving my goals.
I had amazing years of experience in nightlife working as an exotic dancer what made me who I am today and shaped my opinion about men and relationships.
During my work I have realised lots of men don’t know how to approach a dancer, this points to the fact that lots of men don’t know how to approach a woman. The book is about how they shouldn’t approach a dancer or a woman. I didn’t want to write an erotic novel, just to share certain situations and facts about what’s happening in clubs. The main idea was while the whole world is judgemental towards strippers, nobody really talks about those men who have to resort to our service and how they behave.  I bared the social stigma for long enough. People judged me for who I am and what I do, this time let me judge other people, first of all, men who come to the clubs. Because these clubs will exist until men have the desire to come in, but nobody judges them for this pastime. I found lots of books written by sex workers, like The Girlfriend Experience by Rebecca Dakin, but not many strippers wrote books about their work. Maybe there are some books on the American market, but there they have a different style and system in clubs than we have in Europe. The books I’ve read about the stripping industry were more like social studies.
My book is basically a bunch of my stories from the blog about strip clubs but focusing on the behaviour of the average customers. I wrote it with the same openness and honesty as I wrote on my blog. The book is based on Prince Charming and fairy tales, because I haven’t met lots of Prince Charming in those clubs, but more often other characters of fairy tales, like the Big Bad Wolf or the childish Peter Pan.
Growing older I must say I haven’t met my Prince Charming yet. Some good Prince Charming material yes, who had the potential but indeed I met lots of Prince Charmless.
Just for fun, I put them and their stories into 12 categories. I don’t want to give an impression that I was dating a lot but if we think about it, every introduction to a customer is like a date when I want to gain his attention and seduce him to get in the private, while he’s offering me drinks. I’m quite judgemental towards men, it’s true. As one of my friends say, the book is harsh and he thinks it can be successful, but he’s happy that he’s not the man who wants to impress me though.
My future plan is to work as a dating coach, I have finished the course this year and to write more books. I’m not thinking about writing self-help books on dating as there are so many already on the market but talking about real relationship issues in fiction. I already have further ideas for other books. Another privilege of me besides being smart, that I’m pretty. Seriously talking, I’ve done some modelling and I’m pretty comfortable front of the camera so I think photo materials could complete the image of a sexy writer as I’m planning to cooperate with more photographers in the future and create more high-quality photos.
My book has been overviewed by two of my friends, one is a photographer and writer himself but he has never been in a strip club in his entire life, the other friend knows every bit of this word and I know him from a club. For the result, both the opinion and support were used for the final touch on the book. Here I’d like to thank them for their help and I’m thankful for those who don’t lose hope in me during this period.

https://publioboox.com/en_gb/bedtime-stories-from-stripperland

Kisses from sunny Costa Brava

(Meanwhile, I arrived back to London, but I wrote this when I was still there, so let me share the original post.)
 
Sun, sea, beach, good food, sangria.. what else can I wish for more?
I was hesitating to come to Spain or go to Greece instead, but I thought I’ve been in Greece already, let’s try Spain this time! I was a bit worried as I heard a lot about the clubs here and almost all of them offer more than a regular private dance. This club 2 years ago was a brothel too, no wonder if guys are still continuously asking for sex.
And actually, I’m lucky that I came here instead of Greece. The Czech girl who arrived yesterday was there and she almost didn’t get paid according to the crisis there. One night the owner paid her normally but the next one “Sorry I don’t have enough money. So I gave you just that much.” It’s not correct as we have a contract with the clubs how much they must pay for us. And most of our money is commission based. It means customers come and pay, we have the percentage of their money spent on us. With daily payment, I want to get the whole amount on the same day, especially in those countries where they don’t keep the records clear. In countries like Germany, it won’t be a problem as they write everything down.
In Norway I worked for Albanians, in Canada for Asians, now in Spain I work for Russians.
It’s just funny yet confusing, my bosses don’t have a typical Russian name like Sergei or Dimitri. Never heard that name before, now I have three of them in the same club (plus one more in another club)
They are new in business and a little bit unprofessional. But because they don’t know how to make it better, at least they don’t stress the girls to make more money for them.
But the club is boring. It has lots of potentials, but still boring. I can imagine here parties, special shows just like in the local discotheques. The barwoman has enough time to practice her pole dance knowledge, instead of serving the customers. I make money on customers. But how can I make money if it’s a Saturday night, the club is empty, only two young guys are sitting there with one drink (one had only water) not even the bar makes money on them. And finally after one and a half hour later they decide to buy one house dollar each to one of the girls on stage. Wow, she made 2€! And that was money hard earned as they though a boobie massage is included.
And let’s be honest, this is the Costa Brava! On the beach, our men see more tits than in a club where only 5 girls work and there are no continuous stage shows. I spend here more time topless on the beach than at work!
OK, I understand they just opened – maybe 4 months ago – and they are new in the business. Three middle-aged men. Maybe it’s a midlife crisis: they though opening a strip club is easy money and easy fuck for them?

But they have zero organisation skills. We gave them lots of advice as we travel a lot and have seen different clubs with different systems, but they don’t listen. Here if I could make 1000€ in 4 weeks that would be a miracle. But I knew that ahead, so no stress. I still get my 40€ daily salary even the club is empty. I never got 40€ for watching movies as we have Internet access in the club! Accommodation is provided and free of charge and it’s only 50 meters away from the beach. This is I call a paid holiday!

Here is like the language chaos of Babylon as the customers require me to speak Spanish or French, the owners Russian or German. Only a few people speak English, I just wondering why the hell they want English speaker girls then.
One night an Indian guy came to me:
“No chiki chiki?”
“No.” whatever he meant by that. (I have a guess though.)
But during the show in private, it doesn’t matter what language you speak. Words no needed.
The best way to learn a language to have a boyfriend who only speaks that particular language and your love for him will force you to learn. But this is the best way the hate a language too. Once I had a strong feeling for a guy from Puerto Rico, and I started to learn Spanish only because of him. Now I don’t even want to use the words I learned although I understand them. My passion to learn Spanish is gone with him. That scar is deeper than I thought and I realised it now. But I’m proud of my scars on my heart. Without them, it wouldn’t be ME.
Just an update to the end:
On my last week, I made more money than on the previous weeks altogether thanks to the young boys that came to the club. Some of them were nice and very enthusiastic while others were party animals. I like when they drunk and drugged, they forgot we already had a private dance. I have 5 privates with one of them and he thought each dance was the first! So I finished my contract with money and nicely tanned. No reason to complain.

5 things you should never ask from your dancer

1. How much money do you make?
I consider this question extremely rude from a customer’s mouth. Especially when my money depends on how much he’s willing to pay. My experience these guys just asking questions but don’t want to spend much money in the club. I never ask my customers how much money they have in their pocket!
Here in the blog, I write about money and club system because I want to break the stereotype that we, dancers are super rich. Unfortunately, it’s not the case. But still, the question is not polite at all.
2. Can we have sex in private?
NO. Even if it’s possible in some club, don’t make the wrong idea that you can have it in EVERY club, with EVERY dancer. If it’s possible, wait until the dancer makes the move… and you don’t find yourself in an embarrassing situation, most importantly you won’t piss of your dancer.
3. Is there a camera in the private?
YES. The management wants to know what’s going on there. Not only about sex but about drugs or any crime. Or about dancers who make outside business or get cash from the customer when she’s not allowed. Sometimes I can not take tips in private because it would lead me to further trouble with the club
And sometimes for the dancer’s safety. Can you imagine if the customer gets beating her up or being extremely aggressive with her? Or if something gets lost.. or stolen. Of course, they want to know about everything!
 
4. Do you want some beer?
Definitely not! I do drink champagne or cocktails. Not because I’m a lady, but because I earn commission on it. Simple is that.
5. Can I have your number?
It depends. Some clubs allow it, some don’t. It’s not a lie if I tell you I can’t because my boss watches us. But even if I can, I don’t give my number to anyone. Only to those who became a regular customer or I spent a good time with. I don’t want any disturbing messages or phone calls the middle of the night when I want to sleep! Way too many stalkers around.
+1. How do you find the work?
(This you can ask, but myself I’m bored to explain all the time..)
The first thing to make it clear, yes, there are agencies for dancers to cooperate between the clubs and the girls. Usually, clubs don’t like girls working without an agency. And personally, I prefer to work with agencies because if something happens they are there to help (like finding a new place in short notice if necessary) and it’s a safer way because they already know the club and its conditions. But I never need to be worried because I’m working as a self-employed and I pay tax and insurance and I sign contracts with clubs all the time.