Kisses from sunny Costa Brava

(Meanwhile, I arrived back to London, but I wrote this when I was still there, so let me share the original post.)
 
Sun, sea, beach, good food, sangria.. what else can I wish for more?
I was hesitating to come to Spain or go to Greece instead, but I thought I’ve been in Greece already, let’s try Spain this time! I was a bit worried as I heard a lot about the clubs here and almost all of them offer more than a regular private dance. This club 2 years ago was a brothel too, no wonder if guys are still continuously asking for sex.
And actually, I’m lucky that I came here instead of Greece. The Czech girl who arrived yesterday was there and she almost didn’t get paid according to the crisis there. One night the owner paid her normally but the next one “Sorry I don’t have enough money. So I gave you just that much.” It’s not correct as we have a contract with the clubs how much they must pay for us. And most of our money is commission based. It means customers come and pay, we have the percentage of their money spent on us. With daily payment, I want to get the whole amount on the same day, especially in those countries where they don’t keep the records clear. In countries like Germany, it won’t be a problem as they write everything down.
In Norway I worked for Albanians, in Canada for Asians, now in Spain I work for Russians.
It’s just funny yet confusing, my bosses don’t have a typical Russian name like Sergei or Dimitri. Never heard that name before, now I have three of them in the same club (plus one more in another club)
They are new in business and a little bit unprofessional. But because they don’t know how to make it better, at least they don’t stress the girls to make more money for them.
But the club is boring. It has lots of potentials, but still boring. I can imagine here parties, special shows just like in the local discotheques. The barwoman has enough time to practice her pole dance knowledge, instead of serving the customers. I make money on customers. But how can I make money if it’s a Saturday night, the club is empty, only two young guys are sitting there with one drink (one had only water) not even the bar makes money on them. And finally after one and a half hour later they decide to buy one house dollar each to one of the girls on stage. Wow, she made 2€! And that was money hard earned as they though a boobie massage is included.
And let’s be honest, this is the Costa Brava! On the beach, our men see more tits than in a club where only 5 girls work and there are no continuous stage shows. I spend here more time topless on the beach than at work!
OK, I understand they just opened – maybe 4 months ago – and they are new in the business. Three middle-aged men. Maybe it’s a midlife crisis: they though opening a strip club is easy money and easy fuck for them?

But they have zero organisation skills. We gave them lots of advice as we travel a lot and have seen different clubs with different systems, but they don’t listen. Here if I could make 1000€ in 4 weeks that would be a miracle. But I knew that ahead, so no stress. I still get my 40€ daily salary even the club is empty. I never got 40€ for watching movies as we have Internet access in the club! Accommodation is provided and free of charge and it’s only 50 meters away from the beach. This is I call a paid holiday!

Here is like the language chaos of Babylon as the customers require me to speak Spanish or French, the owners Russian or German. Only a few people speak English, I just wondering why the hell they want English speaker girls then.
One night an Indian guy came to me:
“No chiki chiki?”
“No.” whatever he meant by that. (I have a guess though.)
But during the show in private, it doesn’t matter what language you speak. Words no needed.
The best way to learn a language to have a boyfriend who only speaks that particular language and your love for him will force you to learn. But this is the best way the hate a language too. Once I had a strong feeling for a guy from Puerto Rico, and I started to learn Spanish only because of him. Now I don’t even want to use the words I learned although I understand them. My passion to learn Spanish is gone with him. That scar is deeper than I thought and I realised it now. But I’m proud of my scars on my heart. Without them, it wouldn’t be ME.
Just an update to the end:
On my last week, I made more money than on the previous weeks altogether thanks to the young boys that came to the club. Some of them were nice and very enthusiastic while others were party animals. I like when they drunk and drugged, they forgot we already had a private dance. I have 5 privates with one of them and he thought each dance was the first! So I finished my contract with money and nicely tanned. No reason to complain.

When I grew up..

I told you before I always wanted to travel even as a kid. And I also wanted to be on stage as a model or dancer. I remember I was maybe 12 years old when I made some clothes and we were playing a catwalk show with my sister and the girls from my neighbourhood. (The short period when I wanted to be an astronomer and I knew the name of the nebulas, doesn’t count here.) Then designing clothes became a part of the play. First I made them by hand, but later I learned how to use the sewing machine. Later I made my own clothes (and more importantly my mum let me wear them to school!) I even made a few for my friends too. Today I enjoy the great benefits of it when I design my costumes, although I never had a plan back in those days that one day I’ll perform as a stripper.
Also, I was about 12 when I started to write poems. I even won a prize once. Literally, the first money I ever made was from my writing skills. And from the money I won, my mum bought me a gold necklace with a small cross. “That will always remind you of the first money you earned!”
See where I am now? I travelled, I’m on stage, I do modelling and I’m about writing a book. Who told you, you can not reach your dreams???
The poem I wrote and it was read the front of the entire school was about my dreams, what I’d like to see in this world. The first part was about the sea. You think it’s not a big deal, but it is indeed for 12 years old who was living in a country with no beachside and the country just came out of the communist era. The second part was about Africa and a real safari with no cages. Done. 7 months lived in Cape Town was one of my biggest adventures so far. The third part was about landscapes, mountains, waterfalls. And I was lucky enough to see the Mt. Fuji and the Niagara. It sounds crazy that you write down at the age of 12 what you’d like to reach and 20 years later you look back and you say “Damn, I’ve done all!” It’s like making a wish list to the Universe “Hello, these are my dreams. Please, help me to reach them!”
My mum was always supportive and I love her dearly. Then I was a rebel at the age of 15 and I had a wild period (who doesn’t at that age?) I remember when I wanted to go to a party wearing fishnet tights and a leather miniskirt, my mum literally stood in the door hands on the side “you’re not going anywhere dressed like this!” Of course I didn’t measure the danger what could happen if I stood in the bus stop dressed like a hooker (we were living in a small village and the bus stop was on the main road where the truck traffic was quite high) God knows what could happen, but I was so focused on going to that party and I was so upset at her stopping me! Good old days. Now 20 years later we always have a good laugh about this story. But besides going to that party, I got everything I ever dreamed of as a kid.

5 things you should never ask from your dancer

1. How much money do you make?
I consider this question extremely rude from a customer’s mouth. Especially when my money depends on how much he’s willing to pay. My experience these guys just asking questions but don’t want to spend much money in the club. I never ask my customers how much money they have in their pocket!
Here in the blog, I write about money and club system because I want to break the stereotype that we, dancers are super rich. Unfortunately, it’s not the case. But still, the question is not polite at all.
2. Can we have sex in private?
NO. Even if it’s possible in some club, don’t make the wrong idea that you can have it in EVERY club, with EVERY dancer. If it’s possible, wait until the dancer makes the move… and you don’t find yourself in an embarrassing situation, most importantly you won’t piss of your dancer.
3. Is there a camera in the private?
YES. The management wants to know what’s going on there. Not only about sex but about drugs or any crime. Or about dancers who make outside business or get cash from the customer when she’s not allowed. Sometimes I can not take tips in private because it would lead me to further trouble with the club
And sometimes for the dancer’s safety. Can you imagine if the customer gets beating her up or being extremely aggressive with her? Or if something gets lost.. or stolen. Of course, they want to know about everything!
 
4. Do you want some beer?
Definitely not! I do drink champagne or cocktails. Not because I’m a lady, but because I earn commission on it. Simple is that.
5. Can I have your number?
It depends. Some clubs allow it, some don’t. It’s not a lie if I tell you I can’t because my boss watches us. But even if I can, I don’t give my number to anyone. Only to those who became a regular customer or I spent a good time with. I don’t want any disturbing messages or phone calls the middle of the night when I want to sleep! Way too many stalkers around.
+1. How do you find the work?
(This you can ask, but myself I’m bored to explain all the time..)
The first thing to make it clear, yes, there are agencies for dancers to cooperate between the clubs and the girls. Usually, clubs don’t like girls working without an agency. And personally, I prefer to work with agencies because if something happens they are there to help (like finding a new place in short notice if necessary) and it’s a safer way because they already know the club and its conditions. But I never need to be worried because I’m working as a self-employed and I pay tax and insurance and I sign contracts with clubs all the time.
 

Working on Special Events

There are some social events out there that bring more strippers in the town. Like the golf season in Portugal or the Sailing Week in Sylt, Germany. As a dancer you have to apply to book your place otherwise it will be too late. Like me now, in early March I applied to Monaco for the Grand Prix and it was already no free space. They said if someone makes the cancellation, I can go but who would cancel such a money maker event? Never mind, I’ve worked already in Nice during the Monaco Grand Prix and during the Macau Grand Prix. They were a few good days moneywise. In Macau we had to wear a racer girl costume, it was quite funny. Previous year girls even made a promotion on the racing fields. Yeah, when I write or say I do promotion for clubs (when I don’t want to give out details about my job) actually it’s not a lie as I often do that, it’s kind of part of my job.
Giving out flyers also (I must say I hate that!) In Osnabruck they send us to give flyers on the carnival day. It’s a special day in Germany, everyone wears funny costumes on the streets (better than Halloween in England!) and by 6 pm everyone’s drunk. We went to the crowd but rarely gave the flyers as we didn’t want all the wasted guys from the streets to come to the club. We took a few rounds, and we looked at each other with the other girl.
“Do you think the same?”
“Sure. Let’s go home! I will put the flyers in the bin..”
Most of the guys just invited for a drink straight away, there was no point to talk to them.
Also, I worked in Nice when the Filmfestival was running in Cannes and they sent us there to give flyers. Seriously? All those people have access to high-class prostitutes, why would they come to a small and expensive strip club? But we went there, tried to give the flyers and when we saw no point, just went for a nice coffee and we enjoyed our afternoon in Cannes.
Some events can be extremely good for making money. I remember I hesitated to stay in Cape Town until the big mining conference in February (probably the biggest in the world) and I was lucky that I stayed. In those days I made quite good money there. I was not that lucky during the London Olympics. Everybody was excited about it, but in the centre it was nothing. I remember on a Friday night I took the bus to work and I was the only person on the bus! Usually, it’s busy but this time not a single person got on from Finchley Road to Piccadilly. Around the Piccadilly Circus, even cafes and restaurants were empty which is unusual on a Friday. I don’t know how the clubs were close to the games but the centre was empty. As my manager told me, he expected exactly the same as the Olympics is a family event, daddy doesn’t leave mommy just like “Ok, honey, I go to a strip club, won’t be along!” A cricket or football event can bring more guys to clubs and I totally agree.
My last special event was in Brussels: Seafood Expo. If I knew it ahead, I would have changed the dates. Again, we had to go to give flyers. 5 girls and the security guy. But at least he was cool, there were not so many people on the streets so we went to one of his friend’s bar and everybody was invited for a shot. Perfect start for work because we knew later it will be stressful. The club was open on Sunday for this special occasion, they brought extra chairs and paravanes for the private area. They even bought some green plants in metal holders that we can pour the champagne there when nobody sees us. Poor little trees! We made a joke that they will produce grapes after so much champagne! But the truth is those few days were not so productive as they expected. On that Sunday there were only two (2!) customers. And of course, when it’s not so busy, they stress out the girls more, like everything is the girls’ fault because we don’t work well. But we had a full house but not quality customers. They can fill up the whole club with Spanish, Brazilian, Italian customers, through my experience they never pay and just hassle the girls why we don’t have sex with them. If they are alone they might spend, but if it’s a group, no chance. It seems they just prefer other male company. And as I was talking to one of the French guys, he told me this seafood industry is not doing so well this year so probably that’s the reason why people don’t spend much. But one day I was lucky to meet an intelligent guy who paid me some dances and I enjoyed our conversation so I stayed with him pretending to work, but I saw from the corner of my eyes that my manager looked at me with evil eyes why I spend much time with him, why I don’t go to the next customer. Seriously that half an hour talking to him was my mental recovery of the night!
Now I’m really trying to stay away from these kinds of events. They can be maybe a tiny bit better than an average night but it doesn’t worth the stress that the management can give.

Dollar? No dollar? Scheiße egal!

(I would translate it as f***it, doesn’t matter.)

I like the system when the club has its own house dollars for tipping the dancers. It’s like Monopoly money, fun and can give a solid income on a busy night. In Germany most of the clubs have them. When I finish my 2 songs stage performance, I go topless to each customers asking for dollars and they put it in my string. End of the night each dollar count €0.5 to my budget, which is not a lot but if the night was busy it’s easy to collect 50-100 dollars, sometimes even more. We share the tips with the club, so the club keeps the other €0.5. It’s fair enough, in some clubs I’m not allowed to keep the tips at all. I like when the club makes the customers buy the dollars. Let’s say the entrance fee is €10 but they get 10 dollars. Like it was in Luxembourg. In that case, even if they don’t pay anything to the girls, each customer give tips at least. And they rarely take it home keeping it as a souvenir.
My job is to go to everybody. If they don’t have dollars, try to sell them.
Sorry, I don’t have dollars.”
“No problem, I can take euros, pounds, sterling silver or credit card! and I press my boobs showing there is a possibility to swipe the card. Usually, it makes them smile and they buy some dollars.
I remember a long time ago I worked in Salzburg where the club had 2 floors. The stage was downstairs and a small bar upstairs. The rules were very strict, I had to go each time to the bar to see if anybody there and ask for dollars before I enter the changing room. It was exhausting, up and down on the stairs all night. Sometimes it was funny when there were no people, we made jokes with the barmen waving some salviette they wanted to put in my panties. Other night when I worked in Nice, I had a customer who showered the stage during my dance with 100 dollars, papers were everywhere and I had to be careful where to step because it can be slippery. In Brussels, the club didn’t have the dollars, but after the stage show, I still had to go to customers asking for tips. The smallest note is €5 and I could keep all the tips so it was also good. Once a guy was so drunk and he tossed a €50 note in my string. That’s really an easy money to make in a few seconds just to go there and ask if he’d like to tip. Some places I don’t make this tour after the dance, but collecting the dollars is part of the stage show. For example in Antwerp, I hated it, because there is a huge gap between the stage and the customers and every time someone wanted to give me a dollar I had to climb over this gap. It can be dangerous if you’ve had a few drinks! Some guys love to put the dollar in their mouth and ask the girls to take it with her tits. Or mouth to mouth. I always wonder if they are aware of where these dollars were before.. maybe in another guy’s mouth or even worse, in his pants touching his sweaty body. It’s fun but I really don’t like to take it with my lips. Not to mention that you can get some serious bacterial infection.
But the truth is, you come to the club, you have a few beers and 10-20 dollars, even you don’t buy drinks or private dances and you don’t spend a fortune but you still have good points and the girls don’t look at you like you are an idiot saying between themselves “at least he has dollars!” But not everyone’s giving it easily. Here in Osnabrück, I’ve been asked: “Was machst du?” (what do you do?) and the guy showed me a dollar with a huge grin on his face as he has the victory flag in his hand or at least he’s holding a €200 note… Hm, let me think… your dollar means €0.5 to me. What should I do for it? Or the other one who asked me straight away to sit in his lap for a dollar. “The lapdance is over there in the private. Here is no touching.” And he was a bit upset. One dollar won’t make me rich, keep it if you wish! There are others that want to give me with no conditions! But the rudest situation when I went to the table and the guy without even looking at me he tossed a €2 coin to me. “And what should I do with that? Buy some dollars!” and I turned and left. When I make my round, I’m not begging for money. It’s part of the entertaining, part of the fun. Giving coins is rude and humiliating although I know some girls would take it without thinking.
And just an idea at the end: if you really want to tip your favourite dancer with real money, fold it in a little piece (it doesn’t require origami skills) and put it in the front of her string. Not even the most honest dancer would give it to the club and share it after counting the dollars alone in the changing room.