appreciation Archives - Page 3 of 3

To my dear A.,

I’m writing here in an open letter to say thank you for your wonderful friendship. We are in a different part of the World, our paths are not crossing often, but you are always in my heart. I’d like to say a big thank you for all your support, either way, it was financial or emotional. There were hard and difficult times in my Life and I will never forget that you gave me a helping hand to get over with. I also say thank you for all your advice. I’m a bit stubborn sometimes to listen to anybody else but myself and I apologise if I did not follow them. But often they showed me the path I need to start to walk on and move forward.

You were with me almost from the beginning since I work in the night. You’ve seen me happy and sad, angry and disappointed, sometimes drunk. Thank you for listening to all my complains about other girls, my bosses and my crazy stories about stupid situations.

I’m saying thank you again for all your presents. For the chocolates and perfumes, little jewellery every time we met. Even the little things make a big difference. We were not in a romantic relationship, but you always paid attention to make me feel special. Thank you for being so generous to me all the time.

And thank you for the best birthday present I’ve ever got in my life! Since I started to travel, the camera is always with me. You helped me to take all those beautiful pictures I took on my trips. You made it all possible for me. It’s like a part of you always with me when I climb a rock or wait for the sunset. I ensure you I use that camera at my very best knowledge.

I write this letter because since I started this blog, I have lots of old memories coming up. And you were my best customer ever who became a friend. And I’m writing you this letter here because I want to show to others that we strippers not only golddiggers. We can say thank you and we mean it when you treat us as a woman, not like a piece of meat. We also can appreciate the money that the guys spend on us. And the friendship between a dancer and her customer does exist!

Dear A., your friendship always means a lot to me!

Wish you all the best in Life and God bless you!

Lots of love,

Lindsay

Good bye Skegness!

Last week was raining. I thought this week won’t be different. But I’m happy for these days in this small room alone (in the one with the window!) because I can focus on more writing and I had time for some “emotional housecleaning”. This year I wanted to go to the pilgrim’s road to Santiago de Compostella but it requires some financial background what I don’t have this very right moment. Hopefully, my bank account balance will be more stable in the spring and I can rethink it. I have this feeling that I want to be a little isolated from people. I think it’s normal if you constantly work with people (drunk, stupid, arrogant and loud people..) to be alone in your own world to recharge your batteries. Skegness is the best from that point.

I arrived back yesterday. Everything is the same, except the weather. Hallelujah, the sun is shining this weekend! But it seems these are the last sunny days of the year. Today I took a nice long walk on the beach but there were not so many people there. Well, even the coach I took from London was almost empty. Last weekend when I came it was not full, but definitely more people came here for the weekend than this week. The summer is over I guess.

Even the club was empty yesterday. On a Friday evening! I had a few dances but we closed earlier because it was no point to be open. But I still like the people here. So different than in any big cities, they don’t have a business mind and they are so innocent. I had a customer last week, he doesn’t speak too much and he’s just sitting alone with his beer, but he asked me for a dance. When I got naked, I see sparks in his eyes like a little boy when he’s unwrapping his present under the Christmas tree. Bless him! I enjoyed the dance too, I felt special and appreciated. I wish every dance would be the same. He came back this weekend and he just constantly repeated me how beautiful, delightful, special I am. That’s a real ego-boost for me!

Even the women are nice that come to the club. I met 2 girls in their forties and in the first 5 minutes of the conversation they honestly told me that they were prostitutes and “we are in the same boat.” I had a good talk with them, I didn’t feel any competition and bitchiness than usually. You know, there are lots of things I can’t share with my girlfriends outside from the club business. Even they know a lot about my work they can not fully understand the situations. With these girls, we wear the same social stigmas and we can talk honestly about our experiences.

I will miss these kinds of people as these are my last days here. From next week I will jump again in the middle of the mind games as I go back to Switzerland on Monday. Let’s get back to the hardcore business!

In memory of Jimmy

Although I have to confess I didn’t know him well. We were not friends in the deeper meaning of this word. He was my manager. One of the kinds you will always remember. But for sure he was a character of the Mavericks club in Cape Town, South Africa. A lively, funny and definitely an unforgettable character. He was homosexual. I’m not saying that to label him, I’m saying because it was part of his personality. His persona if I can say that.

He was funny when he made a show on stage as a drag queen. Don’t imagine a proper show with costumes and makeup, he just randomly went on the stage when he got bored and took all the attention from customers. Every eye and every spotlight were focused on him. Or when he pretended he’s on a catwalk. My friends and I were sitting on a coach and enjoyed the show as he moved his hips sideways as models do. We were laughing at him and with him. He enjoyed our attention too. Still makes me smile when I remember how he fixed his imaginary make up in the mirror!

I didn’t like him sometimes as he always checked what the girls are wearing. He was a very honest criticism with sharp eyes – and with a sharp tongue too. (But he was right most of the time) I remember when my friend wanted to wear very sexy jeans short and he almost got a heart attack when he saw her! He sent her back to the changing room to change the outfit because jeans short are not “classy”. Or I remember when he was flirting with my customer and end of the story he gave his mobile number to him. My customer was kept telling me all night that “I can’t believe that! I came to a strip club and I got a number of a guy!” It was so funny. (Maybe my customer was also homosexual but he hasn’t realised it yet. For me, it’s a mystery how homosexual guys can spot each other, and they are right most of the time.)

Sometimes I hate my facebook. When you just want to check your notifications and on the wall, the bad news just popping up and hit you in the head. I didn’t even know he was sick. Everything happened so suddenly. A great soul has gone. Now he’s doing catwalk shows to angels in heaven and makes them smile. But he will live forever in our memories and we won’t forget him.

You will be truly missed.

Rest in peace Jimmy Diva!

I was working in Skegness on the weekend

I’m still keeping my words that I don’t really want to work in London, and I thought this time I give a chance to the British countryside instead of the busy capital. Now to be honest I feel a little bit tired to travel again so far. So I had a little conversation with myself to stay in England and try out some new clubs here. One of the British girls in Iceland recommended this club to me, then I contacted the owner, he was nice and extremely helpful so I thought I have nothing to lose. I’ve taken a bigger risk in my life to travel to other continents for work and I didn’t have any personal contact with any of the staff members from that club, only the agency. Agencies take percentage after you from the club, they, of course, want you to go there and they only tell you the nice things. To travel circa 200 km from London to try a club is really nothing to me. Plus I thought Skegness as a holiday place can be busy for the long weekend.

Afterall I’m not surprised that things are not going to be smooth. The club is open only 3 days on the weekends, in theory, it sounds perfect to me to work there and weekdays I’m back in London and I have plenty of time on my hands to finish other stuff I have to. But this bank holiday weekend was extremely boring and slow in Skegness! When I worked in the hostess club in London, the bank holiday weekends were always quiet because people travel to the countryside.. but in the countryside didn’t seem to be crowded either! Does anybody know where are the people then???

They provide accommodation but the place is not 5 stars. In my room, there is no window and it cost me £10 per day. Bloody hell! When I write here I feel like a poor French realist writing in a dark mansard room with candlelight and his only companions are the pigeons on the roof. Luckily there is a door to the rooftop and when it’s sunny I can leave that door open. I don’t think I will spend much time there though. Although when I worked in Canada, the accommodation was similar. Above the club, there were big double rooms originally, but they divided them into 2 single rooms, obviously, the windows were attached to one of them. In the inside rooms were no windows too and I stayed in one of them (for 3 months!) Can you imagine how much time I spent indoors?

And about the people in Skegness: they are – let’s say – simple. (Not in a bad way.) If they don’t want to pay you, they tell you straight. Sometimes it’s a much more appreciated way than playing a game or promising “I’ll have a dance with you later.” Do you know how many times I’ve heard that sentence? And of course in this term “later” means “never”. Actually, I’m happy not to play those mind games with them. And these guys are a little bit naïve too. They have difficulties to understand why I don’t want to work in London. They immediately start to laugh when I say I came all the way from London to Skegness to work in a strip club. “Oh, there is much more money in London!” I’m a bit of tired to explain it again and again why not.

But after all these actually, I’m considering to work in London. At least one day to try. I said so many times that I don’t want to work in London clubs because too much competition and bitchiness between the girls, but never experienced myself. It’s like how can I write about something I don’t have personal experience about? But I need to get my guts up before I go to the cage of the lions.

Until I will be chillin’ in Skegness in my windowless room.

Chasing the Midnight Sun

Let’s start this story with December last year. I’ve been here in Iceland already. I’ve heard lots of good thing about the club here and I wanted to give it a go. 2 days before my flight the agency contacted me that the club is currently not open, but the owner wants me to come anyway as they can reopen at any time. So I arrived but the club didn’t open the next day or next week either. I spent 2 weeks in Reykjavik hoping that I can work but nothing happened. Finally, I gave it up, enjoyed a few days more as a tourist here and I was heading back to the UK.

The owner was very supportive, he totally understood my situation. I can’t have a bad word about him. I told him I want to leave because it’s just not worth it to spend the money I earned in another country (and if I want to take a holiday I would rather go somewhere warm.) So he booked me the ticket back to London, he gave me money for the ticket I lost (I couldn’t just change the date on the return flight) he booked me a hotel for a night and he sent his driver to take me to the airport next morning. He was absolutely correct!

I was not so disappointed. You always take some risks when you travel. And I found Iceland an extremely beautiful country; cold, but very nice. I met a nice photographer here, we rented a car and he took me to the best places where I could take some breathtaking pictures. I went to explore Reykjavik in a snowstorm, when I got snow, rain, hail and strong wind all in one. But I didn’t mind. I visited the Icelandic Penis Museum 🙂 and the Blue Lagoon. I was disappointed only about one thing: I couldn’t see the Northern Lights as the sky was too cloudy those days. But I decided to come back here in the summer. One thing was in my head and made me think: it can’t be a bad place if some girls can wait here long weeks without work for the reopening because they want to keep their place in the club. If they leave, there is a chance that other girls will arrive and they have to wait for free places. Some clubs work with a limited number of girls because of the accommodation. They care about the girls and they don’t just throw a mattress on the floor saying “you will sleep here.”

So now here I am again. Finally, the club is open! And the country in the summer showing a different face. I landed at Keflavik airport at 23.30. Outside was still daylight. Not sun, but let’s say like a rainy day in England. The night started only around 2 am and soon after there was morning already. Friday night lots of people on the streets. It looks promising. Now I can’t wait to see how is work here! 🙂