To be honest, I was never a hard hustler. Some men like the straight approach “do you want a dance?” while others hate it. Dancers do rounds in the club with this approach; they tend to bounce from guy to guy. I like to observe. Sometimes the management is pissed off because it seems I just sit and don’t do my work, but I make eye-contacts. I can feel who’s intrigued enough. I don’t know if it’s good or not, but it works for me.
I’ve never done coaching for my fellow dancers, but I never turned my back to those who were asking for help or information. I genuinely believe the sex industry needs more and more people who come out of the shell and talk openly about personal experiences because being judgemental and pointing out a finger never helped anyone. Because of social stigma, sex work can be a lonely activity.
Luckily, many girls, like Wendy offer to coach and you can ask her about anything you’ve always wanted to learn. Once you are in the business, then do it well! Right?
Tell us a little bit about yourself, where do you live, how did you start dancing?
Hi, my dancer name is Bunny; however, in my everyday life, people call me Wendy. I grew up in Brisbane, for the past seven years I live in Perth, Western Australia. I am 34 turning 35 in November. I grew up practising gymnastics and soccer and always had an active boyish type of energy about me. I have four brothers and no sisters. I always felt drawn towards the stripping industry and often checked to see if I had a dollar coin in my purse if I ever passed a peep show. I studied a bachelor of science once I left school and during this time, I wanted to be a stripper; however, I suffered terrible body image and also chose very abusive boyfriends, my confidence was shot! I used to occasionally visit strip clubs and feel in awe of the beautiful dancers and how their life must be. One night, I think my perfect chance and serendipity (only upon reflection) I was out partying and fell victim to a random glassing (the attack was aimed at somebody else) my lip was almost cut off. I received compensation, and during my reconstructive surgery on my mouth, I also opted for a boob job. I was so broke and focusing on survival and my studies, I never in my wildest dreams thought I could ever afford this! I understand everyone is different, this was my body image issue, and nobody ever saw me naked until this point, and it was one month before my 25th birthday. This event changed the course of my life. I finished my study and worked as a genetic scientist for several years, and moonlighting stripping on the weekends. Eventually, after nearly four years of working two jobs seven days, I was getting burnt out, and so I decided to quit my day job and focus purely on my stripping career. (This was a very intense, tough decision; however, I am glad I made it.) My life started to elevate, and I had never been happier. I realised this is what I am meant to do, and I felt in flow and alignment. Now I have been dancing for 9+ years and have not returned to science.
The first impression is essential. How do you approach customers and convince them to pay you?
I have analysed the entire hustling process, from approaching the customer and all of the fine details involved in this process to converting the conversation to dances and finally onto the upgrades and extensions. It is a very detailed process, and there is no magic one line, that will help you to make money. You must be aware of your entire self, from grooming, body language, body placement, facial expressions, voice tonality, your self-talk, vibe and aura. It can be a simple process or a very complex one, depending on how you want to look at it.
Our brain decides on how we feel about someone when we first meet them within the first 4 seconds. We have already determined whether we like or trust this person, what their intentions are.
Whether or not they are a threat or whether they are likeable? Our brain does a massive amount of work during our initial contact with another human, and that is why we must pay attention to the message we put forth in that initial interaction. People only (generally) want to do business with people that they like and trust and that is why we need to express this message without saying “Hi, please like and trust me!” via our body language and subtle ques. 60-90% of our communication is non-verbal, so being aware of this is a must!
One other thing regarding first impressions; your self-talk and internal environment play a huge role in your approach and first impressions. A positive or even neutral, non-reactive and open mindstate is your best weapon as a strong and consistent hustler. This is my favourite topic, as this is where all of your strength resides, this is allowing you to excel in this profession.
Convincing them to pay you is a whole other kettle of fish. I will mention the big picture of this without getting into detail. First of all, we must find out what the customers like or want and deliver this back to them. No point trying to sell someone a book when they want a jacket! So, find out what they want! That is your job as an entertainer. It is not what you can get; it is about what you can give! It is the customer’s night, we are their entertainers, with a giving mentality you will not meet with scarcity. If you are focused on what you want and what you are not getting/or can get etc., that is a scarcity mentality. People can smell it on you, and you will express it unconsciously and therefore come across as somehow a threat or untrustworthy and off-putting. Always remember, it’s about what can you GIVE not what can you GET! I have a formula which makes it easy to convert conversation into lap dances/cash, which incorporates this mentality into a natural flow. It is versatile; however, it requires a small amount of groundwork to put into practice.
How to keep customers longer in the private room? What is the best way to keep them interested in paying more?
To keep your customer longer in the private room, interested and paying more, you need to establish a connection. Again, if you have found out what your customer is after, you need to deliver this.
I have done my own market research with customers over the years and the top reasons our customers visit us are having fun (banter, hype, commonality, the shared sense of humour) and sexual connection (flirting, seduction, flattery, dirty talk or fantasies etc.) and usually a combination of the two. If you can find out exactly what they are after and deliver this to them, you have a customer who will not want to leave.
As a cherry on top, to offer them an authentic YOU where they can see the real you and they in return can be themselves (this can be rare these days) you will be offering them an invaluable service, and your pay and their appreciation will reflect this!
My website will be live very shortly, as of July 2019. It will have free audios designed for mindset while preparing for work and also for winding down after work. Also, information detailing my interactive workshops available in Australia in person.